I’m going to an ex-gay

I’m going to an ex-gay get together/seminar tonight. I don’t really know what will be going on, but Sam, Andy and I are, well, I guess we are infiltrating the meeting. Not to protest or anything like that, but more to scope out what is going on. We will share the commonality of our faith, but were we come down on the issue of homosexuality and Christianity will be quite different. I think I may have gone to this same event a number of years ago — I remember going to the same church for something similar. It was a long time ago and I don’t really remember much about it at this point. That was when I believe the two were incompatible and that God would eventually heal me. I believe neither at this point, although my faith in and relationship with God remains unscathed. Of course, many would claim I have forsaken me faith, but I haven’t. Just haven’t.
Anyway, Sam grew up in a Christian and Missionary Alliance church whose pastor happened to be his father. He’s a P.K (preacher’s kid). Sam is an Episcopalian with CMA leanings right now. He has a tendency to make appointments with CMA pastors to talk about the gay/Christian issue. Quiet bold at that, Sam is. Sam also has a tendency to go to these kinds of things because, as he says, we never know with whom we might strike up a conversation. So many young people struggle mightily with this issue and trying to bring reconciliation between their two selves. Two selves that simply can’t be brought into one without a mighty struggle. Sadly, too many reject their faith unnecessarily. My heart goes out to them!
My desire is to be a voice, among many I hope, that speaks to the reconciliation of one’s orientation and faith. I’m not really concerned where people come down on the issue as long as the opinion/decision/belief is informed, as long as they have thought through the implications of their stance, as long as they don’t desire simply to support an already decided answer without the struggle for truth. If people come to believe that they are to remain chaste, celibate, then so bit it — just as long as they have made the decision themselves through consideration of all sides of the issue and with the conviction that God has guided them through the struggle to the belief. If people come to believe that it is perfectly within God’s purview for them to be in a same-sex relationship/union without bringing distance between them and God, then more power to ç²—m. Of course, this is were I am right now. I still have a very hard time supporting people who are gay and decide to marry a member of the opposite sex — the would-be spouses have to be thought of first and foremost! I don’t think that generally happens! But, if they have thought through the implications, believe God is directing, and the would-be spouses understand what they are getting into, then who am I to condemn that. Again, I just don’t think it happens that way for the most part.
I know several people who are struggling with this right now. Sadly, most ex-gay ideology doesn’t support the idea of exploration of opinions that aren’t in line with their standard theological beliefs. The fear of deception is great. The fear of coming under false knowledge, false teaching is even greater. What can I say — just encourage people to read, to talk, to seek advise from all sides, pray hard, and then do as they feel God is guiding. We all pass through different eras of our lives and in the midst of those times we might believe and experience very different things. Growth, maturity, experience, increased knowledge all contribute to inform our conscious at any given time. We all change over time. That’s why for me the simply encouragement to seek God with the ability to cast everything aside, to truly listen to the still small voice, will always be the best advise.
Will we get into conversations tonight? Probably not extensively. After all, we could be considered the enemy (the carriers of deception) or as missionary opportunities. I’m curious to see what comes of this.
Listening: The Call’s Greatest Hits (no, not the Calling!) I really like Michael Bean!

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.