{"id":680,"date":"2006-04-08T06:03:55","date_gmt":"2006-04-08T06:03:55","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.hypersync.net\/wordpress\/?p=680"},"modified":"2006-04-08T06:03:55","modified_gmt":"2006-04-08T06:03:55","slug":"boys","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.hypersync.net\/wordpress\/?p=680","title":{"rendered":"Boys"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I was cleaning off my computer desktop (a Mac, of course!) and read this html file.  Since I do not have kids, I do think it is hilarious!<br \/>\nBOYS~<br \/>\n<strong>Raising Boys (some new ones)<\/strong><br \/>\nThings learned from raising Boys (honest and not kidding):<br \/>\n1.) A king size waterbed holds enough water to fill a 2000 sq. ft. house 4<br \/>\ninches deep.<br \/>\n2.) If you spray hair spray on dust bunnies and run over them with roller blades, they can ignite.<br \/>\n3.) A 3-year old Boy&#8217;s voice is louder than 200 adults in a crowded restaurant.<br \/>\n4.) If you hook a dog leash over a ceiling fan, the motor is not strong enough to rotate 42 pound Boy wearing Batman underwear and a Superman cape.  It is strong enough, however, if tied to a paint can, to spread paint on all four walls of a 20&#215;20 ft. room.<br \/>\n5.) You should not throw baseballs up when the ceiling fan is on. When using a ceiling fan as a bat, you have to throw the ball up a few times before you get a hit. A ceiling fan can hit a baseball a long way.<br \/>\n6.) The glass in windows (even double-pane) doesn&#8217;t stop a baseball hit by a ceiling fan.<br \/>\n7.) When you hear the toilet flush and the wor! ds &#8220;uh oh&#8221;, it&#8217;s already too late<br \/>\n8.) Brake fluid mixed with Clorox makes smoke, and lots of it.<br \/>\n9.) A six-year old boy can start a fire with a flint rock even though a 36-year old man says they can only do it in the movies.<br \/>\n10.) Certain Lego&#8217;s will pass through the digestive tract of a 4-year old Boy.<br \/>\n11.) Play dough and microwave should not be used in the same sentence.<br \/>\n12.) Super glue is forever.<br \/>\n13.) No matter how much Jell-O you put in a swimming pool you still can&#8217;t walk on water.<br \/>\n14.) Pool filters do not like Jell-O.<br \/>\n15.) VCR&#8217;s do not eject &#8220;PB &#038;J&#8221; sandwiches even though TV commercials show they do.<br \/>\n16.) Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.<br \/>\n17.) Marbles in gas tanks make lots of noise when driving.<br \/>\n18.) You probably DO NOT want to know what that odor is.<br \/>\n19.) Always look in the oven before you turn it on; plastic toys do not like ovens.<br \/>\n20.) The fire department in Austin, TX has a 5-minute response time.<br \/>\n21.) The spin cycle on the washing machine does not make earthworms dizzy.<br \/>\n22.) It will, however, make cats dizzy.<br \/>\n23.) Cats throw up twice their body weight when dizzy.<br \/>\n24.) 80% of Men who read this will try mixing the Clorox and brake fluid.<br \/>\nThose who pass this on to almost all of their friends, with or without boys do it because:<br \/>\na) For those with no children &#8211; this is totally hysterical!<br \/>\nb) For those who already have children past this age, this is hilarious.<br \/>\nc) For those who have children this age, this is not funny.<br \/>\nd) For those who have children nearing this age, this is a warning.<br \/>\ne) For those who have not yet had children, this is birth control<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I was cleaning off my computer desktop (a Mac, of course!) and read this html file. Since I do not have kids, I do think it is hilarious! BOYS~ Raising Boys (some new ones) Things learned from raising Boys (honest &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/www.hypersync.net\/wordpress\/?p=680\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[11],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-680","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-misc"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hypersync.net\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/680","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hypersync.net\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hypersync.net\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hypersync.net\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hypersync.net\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=680"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.hypersync.net\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/680\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.hypersync.net\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=680"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hypersync.net\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=680"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.hypersync.net\/wordpress\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=680"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}